If You Want To Know What's Really Inside, Don't Read the Label

Ha! Hard to believe I've neglected this blog for two months, but between the holidays and going through a breakup, I just haven't had any mojo for writing, let alone much time. Besides, I don't really think anyone reads this thing, so I don't suppose it matters whether I write or not.

Anyhow, I've been thinking a lot lately about the huge chasm that exists between Christ followers and non-Christ followers, and I have this theory that I think has some merit. I think the problem comes in because of our tendency to use mental labels on people. Whether we like it or not, we humans have this bent toward categorizing everyone and everything, and this really stirs up the pot when it comes to living in relevant relationship with people who don't share our fundamental beliefs.

Not so many years ago, I remember being almost fearful of "non-believers." My reasoning: I can't relate to them. What a joke that turned out to be! The truth was that I couldn't relate to them because of the mental label (category) I'd created for them in my head, not because we had nothing in common. It's only been in the past two years that I've learned to throw away my labels and start taking people one on one. And what a difference! I've developed meaningful relationships with people I wouldn't have ever been able to relate to before. One's a homeless climbing bum who barely scrapes by and spends a lot of nights sleeping on his friends' couches. I don't see a label when I think of him. I see him, his face, his name. I see an intelligent, capable and courageous man who dares to sacrifice in order to live the kind of life I wish I could enjoy, free of the clinging arms of corporate America. Another friend is an atheist. We don't agree on anything, but we're real with each other, and she's one of the first people I hunt down when I need a sympathetic ear and some solid advice. One of my friends is a lesbian, and it never ceases to amaze me when I find myself catching up with her and being solicited for relationship advice. Me of all people giving relationship advice to a lesbian! But she isn't a lesbian to me. She's just herself, my friend. She's not a label. She's a person.

I have other friends that labels could once have kept me from: a convicted criminal, an alcoholic party girl, a crack addict. And I love them all dearly. To me they are faces, names, personalities, shared memories. They are the souls who fill my life, the ones who hug me and care for me and offer me the hand of unconditional friendship.

This use of mental labels in the church separates Christ followers from non-Christ followers much the same way that labels have always separated people. I won't use the horrible label that was so often applied to African Americans in days not too far removed. But there have been other labels throughout time. Slaves, serfs, peasants. People have made labels based on race, class, intelligence level, type of career, religion, sex, size, and the list goes on and on. And with those labels they have included a list of assumptions and beliefs that give definition and meaning to the label. Whether those assumptions are true of all those who are labeled ceases to matter. The label defines them and dictates how they should be treated.

I think it's time we did away with labels. I think it's time we stopped looking at people and defining them as wicked or depraved. They're just people. They're just names and faces, broken dreams and broken lives. They're just hearts and souls looking for the same love and comfort and home that we're looking for. They're just looking for it in different places and ways.